Today my wife and I have a relationship that is stronger than ever. At least once a week her and I will talk about how much things have changed in three years. I often say to her that I can never repay her for all that she has done for me. I mean who still loves a man that only remembers bits and pieces of their wedding because his blood sugar was so high. It pains me every day to think that I ruined our wedding. That is something I can never give back to my wife. I owe my life to my wife. As a caregiver my wife is amazing, somehow someway she needs to be recognized for what she has done and what she does on a daily basis. As a caregiver she puts up with an awful lot, she is not the one who is sick but she has to put up with everything that comes along with the diabetes. All I have to do is take insulin, test my blood sugar and exercise. She has to put up with the attitude that accompanies low blood sugar, she worries day in and day out about me, what if I get very low one night and don't wake up.
Every day that I get on that bike I do so for my wife. This Sunday I have a few shots at winning a jersey for her, I know that a jersey won't fix the past but it will show her that I'm alive and the only reason I could win that jersey was because of her. When things get tough on the bike as they often do I think about my wife and how she never gave up on me. If I give up on that bike I'm giving up on someone who has kept me alive. I have let her down to many times before and I will never let her down again.