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The Diabetic Cyclist

Ribs come and go

2/12/2012

1 Comment

 
Somehow my shoulder and right arm know that its anniversary was today.  I often get odd tingling and warm sensations in my arm but today they seemed to be around more so than usual.  Three years ago today I was in surgery to fix my shoulder but the surgeries proved to not only fix my shoulder but it fixed me as a person.  By now everyone knows the story but on the anniversary of the event I can’t help but to reflect on my new life.  I often say that I’m living on borrowed time and as tough as it is to hear I find that to be true.  I truly believe I should not be here and if it weren’t for the surgery three years ago today I don’t think that I would.

I’ll start with the best part of the day.  Two years ago my wife suggested we go out for ribs to celebrate my one year surgery anniversary.  Somehow it has stuck, we need help.  Getting ribs makes me think that much more about the past and life.  The truth is I want to keep getting ribs on my anniversary so I never forget where I was at one time.  I was in a bad place and that’s something I need to remember so I have the drive to succeed.  Anyway, dinner was amazing and I can’t thank my wife enough for everything that she has done.  I’ll wrap this up because I don’t want my tears to ruin the keyboard.

Today was an off day for me exercise wise, which means I sat around and did more reflecting and thinking then I should have.  Today I was a lot quieter than usual; I went in to Bill Russell mode as I like to call it.  Bill Russell was a great man who only opened up to people he truly loved and cared about, his teammates tell of how he was genuine, loyal and caring man.  For the media Bill Russell was an odd man who never talked and when asked a question gave short direct answers.  In many ways I’m Bill Russell on a daily basis, my family, athletes, close friends and my wife know the real me.  The guy who talks a lot, plays jokes, and truly enjoys life.  To anyone else I’m that weird guy who is very quiet and intimidating.  I was that quiet guy today, I know it’s not fair to the people close to me but it happens.  I shut down and just think about my life as a whole. 

Before I started writing tonight I headed over to YouTube.  I found the Lance Armstrong video that got me in to a band and in to cycling.  My obsession with Lance comes from this video; it shows the greatness before cancer, the cancer battle and life after cancer.  When I first saw this video I remember crying while watching it, thinking if he can beat cancer and be a world class cyclist I can “beat” diabetes and become a decent amateur cyclist.  I started to watch this video on a daily basis while recovering; it helped tremendously in a weird way.  As I watched the video this evening, I cried yet again but this time thought about the future.  I want to do something in my life that I can put in to this kind of video.  I have two of the three things covered.  I have the surgery and diabetes part also I have the cycling part, what I need is the moment that changes the world.  I may not change the world but I want so much to make a difference for people living with diabetes.  I’m working very hard and getting closer to making this dream a reality.  Hopefully by the time I’m fifty I’ll have my own little YouTube montage.  With the people around me I have everything I need to succeed.

Below is the video, I ask you to watch it and look at Lance as a normal person.  Someone that beat cancer, not someone that is accused of cheating and doping.  Try connecting the video to someone in your life that has beaten the odds.  After watching the video I hope that you get in contact with that person in some way and tell them what they mean to you and that no matter what happens you will be there for them always.

1 Comment
Leanne
2/12/2012 09:37:48 am

I LOVE YOU! Thank you for sharing your story with the world...what you do does make a difference!

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 All diabetics are not textbook cases